(Translation: Julius Malema, your penis is small.)
Now, I don’t know if this is true, but it might be. It would certainly explain a lot.
More importantly, however, it would probably piss him off quite a bit if people start saying it about him.
And that makes me happy.
So how would somebody go about spreading a rumour like that? Well, there are a couple of things you could do:
- Pay somebody to say he or she had sex with Julius Malema and when Jesus was handing out penises, Julius got seriously short changed.
- Hide in Julius Malema’s house until you get a chance to take a photograph of his penis. Of course, this will only work if he actually has a small penis.
- Tell everybody you know that you have it fromĀ a reliable source that Malema’s junk is actually a very small mess.
These all seem like too much trouble to me. I also don’t really care whether or not people believe the rumour, so substantiating it seems a bit like overkill. If Julius Malema’s name could be mentioned in the same breath as small penises, I would count it as a success.
So I put this little post on a long-neglected blog. I also plan to encourage people to link to his blog using an isiXhosa phrase that means “You have a small penis” (according to a Xhosa acquaintance of mine), like so: Unento encinci.
I don’t even know if that’s his real blog. In fact, I doubt it. But it’s good enough for me.
I know it’s not the most adult way to deal with the fact that I don’t like the man. But it’s something. He’s always talking about “the whites” this and “the whites” that. Screw you, Julius. At least this white dude doesn’t have a small penis.
If you don’t like Julius either, paste this link where ever Google might pick it up:
Julius Malema, unento encinci.
Maybe, just maybe, if enough people do that, we’ll piss the bastard off a little. And maybe that will make you feel a little bit better, too.